Into The Past
by iBeastBoy
Summary: When a emergency calls in from Africa the titans are called in to help, But Beast Boy is worried about his past coming back to haunt him... can he learn to trust his team with his past?
1. Chapter 1

**Into The Past **

_Chapter 1_

It was another average day in Titans Tower. Each of the titans were off doing their normal daily activities; Cyborg was working on the T-car, Raven could be found

meditating in her room, Robin was going over the list of criminals with the help of Starfire, and Beast Boy was hanging out in his room. It was just one of those

days where everything was peaceful and everyone was able to rest- Except Beast Boy.

Lately he had kept himself isolated from the team and spent more and more time in his room. Although it wasn't like him he insisted to the team he was fine and

just needed some time alone.

A little over a year ago the titans learned his real name, Garfield. For months they mocked him for the funny sounding name and although he laughed it off it

bothered him- Of course he never let that show. From time to time Robin would drill him on why he left the Doom Patrol, where he came from, and how long he

was with the DP, However Beast Boy wanted nothing to do with any of this and just ignored Robins prodding. He wasn't ready to tell them his story. About the

horrible things he caused, how his parents died, how the Doom Patrol was a mess, and how everything that happened was his fault. No, he wasn't ready.

Beast Boy had locked himself in his room earlier in the day and had been going through a few of his personal belongings. After the beast incident he had changed up

his room. He got rid of the bunk bed for a nice normal "big boy" bed, the room was no longer all green, and it was actually clean! His room finally looked as if a

responsible adult was living there. At the end of the bed he had a small trunk with some things he had collected over the years and there was a desk with a small

bookshelf in the corner.

"I miss you both so much." he sighed to himself as he laid on the bed with a book spread out. A picture was in his hands, In the photo there were two adults- Mark

and Marie, and a young blonde haired, normal skinned boy- young little Garfield. The Logan Family. That's who they were. World renown scientists known for finding

rare strains of viruses and cures. He smiled to himself as he looked through the book. More photos of the three littered the pages, from stories about raising their

child in the jungles of the world to when their young son attracted the rare sakutia virus and was "cured". Newspaper articles, lab notes, and small crayon scribbled

pictures were all pasted inside the old weathered book. A small tear escaped his eye as he turned to the last page "**Logan family killed in tragic accident**" read

the headline of the newspaper clipping. Beast Boy closed the book without even looking at the photo that was on the page.

He slowly made his way from the bed and over to the trunk where he put the book. "I'll check back with you in a few years, alright?" he asked to no one in

particular. Sighing he lifted himself from the floor. He missed home. The titans didn't know who he was, let alone where he was from. He still couldn't tell them, it

was just too painful. "Gotta get outta this funk" he said to himself, "Maybe I'll go play some MM4 to cheer-" but he couldn't finish. The alarm started to sound.

The titans gathered in the common room to see what the problem was, Most likely Cinderblock had escaped again or maybe even Plasmus. As they waited for the

distress call to come through a fuzzy message began to play "mmmbwaa hakuna Africa". The message played over and over. Beast Boys eyes were huge, "_Crap!_

_Crap! Crap_!" was all he could think. Puzzled Cyborg looked at the scanners "Hey Rob, I think you better check this out-This call is comin' from Africa.". It was

strange, the young heros usually didn't have calls from other countries. Figuring it was something important for them to be contacted Robin looked to the others,

"Pack your bags team, we're going to Africa". The titans nodded, Beast Boy was frozen in his spot and Raven seemed to notice "Whats the matter _Garfield_," She

said using emphasis on his name, " too scared to go to the big jungle without mommy and daddy?". Beast Boy tensed- and for Raven the comment was an instant

regret, the hostility and anger from Beast Boy was radiating directly at her "Don't you ever say things like that-EVER." Beast Boy yelled. For a second all he could

think about was pouncing in for an attack- She wouldn't know it was coming, he would pounce and attack her but then reality kicked in, She didn't know what

upset him and he couldn't let the beast get the better of him. "Beast Boy... What's your deal?" she asked, He just scoffed before storming out of the room. "Please

friend Raven, what is it friend Beast Boy is upset about?" Starfire asked, not sure with what had just gone on. For once Raven didn't know. "I'm not sure Star, I

have no clue what happened.".

He stormed into his room and locked the door before letting out a roar. Of all the places to have an incident it would be Africa. From what scrambled message came

through he knew they were in for some deep trouble. The tribes of Lamumba weren't the friendliest and with their voodoo villan-as the man had put it, around it

could be even worse. The titans didn't know what they were getting themselves into and Garfield knew it was not going to be an easy quick mission like he knew

Robin was thinking. As much as the transmission worried him the only thing he could think of was home. It scared and excited him. Looking over to his trunk he

carefully opened it back up and grabbed out the tattered book. "I guess I"ll be seeing you sooner than expected" he whispered as a tear fell down his face. He gave

the book a hug while trying to calm himself down. "I'm not sure if I'm ready for this..."

Cyborg while not involved in the earlier incident felt compelled to make sure his little brother was all right. The odd behavior of him wanting to be left alone recently

and this sudden outburst worried him. It wasn't like Beast Boy. He figured maybe the beast was trying to get out and he was having a hard time dealing with it, so

he decided to check in on the grass stain.

"You in there B?' Cyborg said as he walked into BB's room. He found Beast Boy sitting next to his trunk- hugging something. "Hey man, you alright?" the

mechanical man asked whilst trying to see what it was the green beans hand. Beast Boy, noticing the invasion just looked at him. "Just go away alright? I'm trying

to pack" the green titan spat, "Woah easy dude, it's just a lil trip in the T-Ship, what's got you on edge? Beast gettin' ahold of you? you've been awfully quiet lately

B, just worried that's all". The thought of someone worrying about him was something he was used to, he could sense the others worries and he did his best to

ignore them. "Yea, I'm alright, just tired lately that's all..." "Maybe this will be kinda like a vacation mission after we find whatever is wrong, We could all use it" the

metal man said. Beast Boy nodded in response, tossed the book he was hugging in the trunk and closed it. 'Alright Cy, sorry for earlier guess I just got a bit excited

that's all..." But he knew excitement was the wrong word. He was anxious and it was beginning to bug him. With a nod of his head Cyborg left him to himself and

he began to pack _"Looks like I'll be needing the old list again..."_

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><p>Hi guys! This is my first attempt at a fan fiction, not really sure how it all works but figured I'd try it out :) I look forward to all commentsreviews/suggestions for this fic :) thanks~


	2. Chapter 2

**Into the Past**

_Chapter 2_

The long flight to Africa had been fairly quiet between the titans, not quite sure what they were going up against. The transmission came from somewhere in the

Upper Lumumba area and that's where they were headed. From what Cyborg could get translated from the choppy message they were up against some Voodoo

Man who was attacking what little resources the villages in the area had. How they got through to the titans was unknown-save for one individual. For the most

part the trip over was nice. The sky was clear, the view was great, and everyone seemed to be happy with the out of the country mission since Jump had been

rather slow lately, If anything happened while they were away Titans East would be there to take care of it.

Upon arrival to the large jungled area the titans began to make a game plan. But Beast Boy wasn't paying attention, His mind was elsewhere. It had been almost

fifteen years since he had laid eyes on his birthplace. Thoughts came rushing back as he remembered how the landscape went on for ages, the way the trees smelt

after a long drought, the first time he heard a lion roar over the savannah. He was home. After years and years, he was back in Africa. He took a deep breath,

breathing in the jungle smells. "Titans, Let's move out." Robin said before heading in an eastern direction. Still stuck in thought Beast Boy clumsily made his way after

their leader. Robin had grown accustom to the jokester falling behind and it slightly irritated him. "Beast Boy, keep up! We don't have all day and the sun is already

going down." Robin told him in a stern voice, Beast Boy just snorted, "We're going the wrong direction" as he pointed to the west "That's where we need to be going".

Confused Robin looked at the map, Realizing his mistake he just grunted, "Out of my way" and pushed past. Robin was confused as to how Beast Boy knew which

direction to go without a map but figured it was his animal senses kicking in. Beast Boy smiled to himself, "_It's good to be back_". The sun had begun setting and the

titans continued on for a few more miles before Robin brought the team to a halt. "We'll camp here for the night, Each will take turns guarding camp until morning,

Got it?" They nodded in unison.

As the titans began to setup camp Raven took notice of how Beast Boys attitude had changed. He was much more at ease, yet there was still something concerning

him. All the hostility he had shown before was gone and replaced with anxiousness. She couldn't tell if it was the mission affecting him or the fact that he was in

one of the wildest places on earth-and enjoyed it. She would've rather of stayed home and finished her book or even enjoyed the peace and quite but the sounds of

the distress mission sounded urgent enough for Robin to believe they all needed to be there. Beast Boy had climbed up a tree, "Hey guys, you should really not

sleep on the ground. There's some nasty snakes and bugs that live here not to mention some bigger animals that aren't afraid to have you for a snack!" He

announced. The titans just shrugged, earning a sigh from Beast Boy, "YOU GUYS! Seriously! You didn't even bring anything to protect yourselves with, do you

KNOW you're in a JUNGLE?" Shaking his head in disgust he jumped from the tree and ran to his backpack. The others had laughed at him for having something so

huge to carry around but he just ignored them. "You guys'll be thankin' me now!" he stated while pulling out some mosquito net coverings for the team, "The

mosquitos here are deadly, one bite and you'll probably get maleria!". While the green titan passed around the covers Robin began to actually think it was a good

idea that BB had brought along the giant sack. The realization that Beast Boy knew more about the animals they would most likely encounter made Robin believe

he should've drilled him before they left. It seemed that every time they needed something or had to figure out how to do something here Beast Boy knew the

exact way to do it, as if he was a wild jungle man.

Cyborg and Raven began to setup a fire, Starfire and Robin were figuring out their next move, and Beast Boy went exploring. When he came back he had some

different fruits that they could eat alongside what food they had brought. "Friend Beast Boy, These fruits are most delicious" Starfire told him while chowing down

on some fruit, "Please what type of fruit is this you bring to us?" Beast Boy just grinned, "Oh just something I sniffed out, They're called cloud berries... but around

he-" he stopped, realizing he almost just blew his cover, "_Yea Gar, __real smart! give em your past all up over some fruit!_" he thought to himself, luckily the others

were too busy enjoying their "dinner from the jungle" as Beast Boy had put it to realize what he was saying.

Robin announced it was time to start the first nights shift. While he was trying to figure out who would go first Beast Boy volunteered to watch the whole night

"My powers will be more useful at night here because you guys wouldn't know what to do if something happened-as far as animals go, it's cool I'll watch" he said

before morphing into a lion. As the others settled BB let out a loud roar and perked his ears, When he realized the puzzled and annoyed look on his teammates faces

he turned back to a human "ummm.. you can hear a lions roar for five miles out here so I figured I'd let the other lions know to leave us alone, heh" he said,

looking nervous. "Out here?" "_uh oh, Raven heard"_ he though, "Uhhh yea, I read it in a book... lions are from Africa ya know Rae!" he smiled, trying to save

himself. A nod was all he got in response.

Darkness fell and Beast Boy sat high up in a tree, watching the stars and listening to the sounds of the jungle. "fifteen years, fifteen long years" he said quietly to

himself. The others had fallen asleep and after much convincing from Beast Boy they had ended up in the trees as well. He knew it was safer not only from the

animals that lived on the ground, but because he used to go on trips like this with his parents. He sighed, he hadn't been back to Africa since their deaths. "I miss

both of you every day" he said, this time a little louder as if the African landscape could hear him. He looked up at the stars, knowing his parents were watching him

from above. He couldn't help but feel overwhelmed and sadden to be in the same jungle they used to camp in. The real mission they had came for seemed less of

an importance to him-He had a real mission he needed to figure out while he was here. Who was he?

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><p>Raven couldn't sleep, try as she might the jungle was no place to rest with it being filled with noises at night. From her makeshift hammock she could see strange<p>

animals below "_for once he was right_" she thought. She had faced away from Beast Boy so she could escape his "sleep checks". Although she knew he would try to

protect them at all costs there was a chance he could fall asleep on duty, she wasn't willing to let him do that. After all, over the years the green titan had gotten

them into some trouble. It was odd though, he seemed prepared, knew they were going the wrong directions, and knew exactly how to camp in the jungle. Her

mind started to wonder what exactly the green nussiance had done in his previous years before the titans, that's when he started talking.

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><p>"There are tons of stars out here, you would've loved this" he sighed, Raven began to think he was talking to Terra. "<em>How pathetic<em>" she though in disgust as she

tried to ignore his squeaky voice, "_you should be way over her by now..._" she thought as she bitterly remembered the betrayal and hurt she had brought upon not

only the team but Beast Boy as well. "I remember that one time he told you he was gonna tape your eyes closed so you would rest!" BB laughed. This was

different, Raven let curosity get the better of her and continued to listen, all the while Beast Boy oblivious to her prying ears. "I remember when I first climbed that

giant tree and you both freaked out because I was so small and I had climbed so high and you couldn't get me down..." his small voice cracking with a hint of

sadness, "Those were the days...". It was all he said for the rest of the night.

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><p>We'll see how this goes :) excited for the next chapter? What does Beast Boy's past have to do with any of this? Stay tuned for the next chapter of <em><strong>Into the Past<strong>_

please remember to rate and review :) thanks to those of you who already have! :D


	3. Chapter 3  In flight

**Into the Past**

_Chapter 3_

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><p>The hint of the sun was peaking through the trees creating a stained glass effect on the now waking titans. Despite being super tired Beast Boy had managed to stay awake the entire night. Too many thoughts were keeping him awake. Usually it would've bugged him but for the first time he was grateful for them. He had done exactly what he had told his team he would do-protect them through the night.<p>

"Morning dudes!" he yelled from the ground, "We better get movin' if you wanna get across this jungle!". Robin nodded in agreement, "Fine, but we eat first.". After their breakfast they set out headed what the map said was the direction to go. "Beast Boy, Raven-Fly ahead and see if you can find a quicker path out of here." Robin commanded. With a squawk Beast Boy had turned into a African Gray (or in his case- Green) and was already flying ahead. Raven caught up in no time, after all Beast Boy was just a bird flying, she could do that with ease. The two had flown several miles together in silence, there was something about him that was troubling her. He had been quite most of this trip except to point out things Robin should've known, He knew exactly how to camp, His weird conversation with who-knows-who last night, and his whole attitude was unreadable. Almost sensing her thinking about him he gave a quick chirp and headed down towards some tree tops. He landed swiftly and changed back into his human form, "I gotta rest, my arms are tired." he said with a sigh. "Didn't sleep much?" Raven asked, trying to make small talk. The green titan hadn't said much to her-if at all since his outburst back at the tower and it bugged her. It bugged her even more that she was worried about hurting his feelings, usually she didn't care.

Beast Boy just shrugged, "No not at all, I was only up all night watching you guys remember?" he said with a slightly sarcastic tone. She just rolled her eyes, "Well if you want to rest now is the time to do so, Robin won't know and I won't tell him if you're really that tired." she said flatly. He was confused, here was Raven the person who disliked him the most offering to let him catch some Z's and not tell Robin? What? That didn't compute with his brain. "What's the catch?" he asked in disbelief "Nothing," she said "To be honest I didn't get the greatest sleep in this Azar-forsaken place and could use some time to meditate, plus we could both fly faster when we're rested and find the end of this place sooner". He gave her a grateful look, he knew he needed some sleep after the long night. "Thanks Rae, I am pretty tired." Beast boy mumbled genuinely. He hoped down to a lower branch and closed his eyes, He didn't know if he'd get the best sleep but the offer of some was better than nothing. He could hear Raven chanting her mantra, it was strangely calming, slowly his eyes fell shut and the world went dark.

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><p><em>"Garfield? Garfield HELP!" He could hear her screaming, "I'm coming! Where are you?" he yelled out into the jungle, It was mid-day but the sky was growing dark with clouds. "Over here!" the woman called, "I-I can't! I can't find you!" he cried, the tears were streaming down his face. "No stay there!" Beast Boy hear a man say, "Garfield you listen to me-Whatever you do don't you come over here, We lo-"<em>

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><p>"<strong>NO!<strong>" He awoke with a start, sweat was pouring off of him and he was shaking. Raven was right there holding him, "B-Beast Boy? Are you alright? You were screaming?" She asked concerned, Never had she hear him yelp and cry out with such emotion, and the feelings from him were strong. Fear, worry, self-hate- they just kept coming. He looked at her, completely scared and worried, "I-I-I'm fine... just a... bad dream.. that's all" he whispered. His eyes were filled with sadness and uncertainty and he was uncomfortable. Raven could feel this and just looked at him, "I won't tell anyone." she said before leaving him.

His head was a mess, He couldn't even come to his senses and it hurt. The dream hurt. Was it a dream? Why now? Questions ran through his mind endlessly, making him feel worse and worse "Raven, wait!" he cried out, hoping she hadn't gone too far ahead of him. Thankfully she was just above him waiting, "What Beast Boy?" She asked, hoping he wouldn't start an awkward time consuming conversation, She was worried about him but this didn't seem like the time to have a heart-to-heart with the changeling. "I, uh, that is, um... I-I can't morph." he said, looking to the ground with shame. His ears drooped and his shoulders were slumped. For him to not change was not normal, "Beast Boy Wh-" he stopped her before she could continue. "You know how, well your powers run offa emotion?" The empath nodded, "Yes Beast Boy..." "Well, uh... When I have a lot going on, or I can't concentrate very well... I can't change. My powers just... shut off." he confessed. The girl sighed, of all times for him to have some mental block it would have to be when they were alone in the jungle-supposed to be doing a mission. "Beast Boy, Do you wanna talk about it?" she asked, hoping that he would say he was alright and magically start morphing again. Much to her dismay the green titan sighed, "I dunno... It's just that... well... I just have some personal demons I need to sort out first... This place, it's so..." He growled, the green titan felt exposed, he couldn't tell her everything-yet he longed to tell someone something, "Lets just say the animals and primal instincts from here are a bit extreme... they... mess with me." he said, choosing his words carefully to make his lie more convincing. "I just need a few minutes" he admitted. "Alright, but I hope you can get this fixed, we can't have you goofing up your powers when we really need them out here." comment the gray girl. Truthfully he was the most valuable when it came to a place like this, those instincts he had were a huge help, weather anyone wanted to admit it or not.

The two sat for a while in silence, Beast Boy just staring at his shoes. This dream was eating away at him, he needed something to get his mind off of it. "Hey Rae?" he asked quietly, "It's Raven- and what?" "Can, we... maybe... try meditating?" he said sheepishly. He didn't know if it would work, but at this point if it took his mind off of the horrid dream he just might be able to change and they could resume their jobs. The empath gave him a funny look, "Beast Boy, are you sure you want t-" "Yes Raven, I do" he interrupted, "I need to focus on something". She just nodded, She still couldn't read him, but his eyes pleaded for some sort of help and instruction to ease his mind.

"Aright, first you have to find your center," the girl began, "Next, begin to chant, azarath metrion zinthos... azarath metrion zinthos..." The two sat in harmony, one trying to find his sanity, the other trying to help her friend. It was a sight unseen by any of the other titans, animals, or even each other. No jungle sound could bother the two, No person could interrupt them, and no one could see the empath teaching the green boy to meditate. No one could see as opposites were brought together in one peaceful place.

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><p>AN: I know my chapters are sorta short :p still trying to figure out how this whole doc uploader and settings work. gah. lol. Anyways have a Merry Christmas, or whatever you celebrate :) New chapter after the new year most likely! :D


	4. Chapter 4

The day had grown longer and the sun was steadily rising higher into the sky. Two titans hardly noticed however. The silence they had engulfed themselves in was so peaceful that nothing could interrupt them- or so they thought. Beast Boy was still having troubles focusing, him not being much for meditation and all. Raven was at peace herself but Nevermore was in utter chaos. The emotional trauma the green changeling was putting himself through puzzled them. Raven had to do something.

"Beast Boy?" she asked him, breaking the silence. "Hmm?" he half heartedly responded, "Are you able to change yet? It's getting later in the day." The boy cracked open an eye and sighed. With a nod of his head he tried to morph but found he still couldn't. He hit the ground in frustration, "Gah! I can't do anything right! I'm so worthless!" he growled. The telepath was taken aback- the green titan before her began to mentally beat himself up more and more, the emotions starting to affect her. "Beast Boy?", no response. "Beast Boy!" she yelled a bit louder but still he ignored her, making hurtful comments to himself. She watched for a moment as he slammed his hands into a tree branch and fell to the ground in a defeated slump. This was not like him, this was not Beast Boy, this was not her friend. It was time for her to take action. She walked over to where he laid and rested a hand upon his shoulder. "Beast Boy? Talk to me, what's wrong?" she inquired, this time genuinely concerned. He merely pulled himself into a ball as if he was trying to hide. "Beast Boy I'm serious. Talk to me.". This irritated him even more, "NO!" he barked as he pushed her hand off his shoulder and began to move away, When he was about seven feet away from her she started in, "Garfield... I just want you to be okay... I'm your friend. Please, if you need help please talk to me."

Beast Boy let out a yell as he fell to his knees "I CAN'T DO THIS RAVEN. I just CAN'T!"

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><p>Robin was beginning to get impatient. It had been two hours since he had sent Raven and BB off and he hadn't heard nor seen anything from them. "Cyborg, find out where they are, we need to get a status report." He commanded while he pulled out his communicator. "Robin, Calling Raven and Beast Boy, Over." He watched as the fuzzy picture came up, it was Raven. "Raven here, over". She didn't want to deal with him at the moment or explain why they had stopped. In fact Beast Boy was in the middle of some personal life crisis and she was the last person to want to report that to Robin. "Well, what have you two found? It's been almost two hours with nothing!" Raven replied, "It's not too far I don't think, We stopped to find some water and food for lunch. We're gonna need it with this landscape." She lied. It was for the best right now.<p>

"Perhaps we can assist you in the gathering of necessities!" Starfire chimed in, truthfully she was beginning to get bored listening to Robin stew over this mystery villain. Cyborg wasn't that much of an interesting person to talk to while in the jungle either. No, she preferred to be flying alongside Raven at the moment. "Thanks Star, but we've got it here" Raven told her. Star simply nodded, "Very well.". "Cyborg has a lock on your position, we'll meet up with you in a little while and we can find a new place to camp. We've got a lot of ground to still cover. Over and out."

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><p>Raven sighed, this is great. Beast Boy is loosing it, the others are on there way, and they hadn't covered hardly any ground. The girl looked over to the green mess that was Beast Boy. He was curled into a ball, hands tight against his hair. Raven could hear him mumbling to himself, calling himself horrid names, and it sounded like he was crying. She couldn't deal with this. "Garfield, What is going on? What can't you do? Don't make me go inside your mind" she threatened. He growled, "Leave me alone Raven!". His attitude had taken a strange turn for the worst, this had to stop. "Beast Boy..." she said sternly, "Answer my question, what can't you do?" He looked at her with a look that could kill "THIS! Africa! I can't do this!" he spat as if she should know. He began to shake, "I-I just can't... I can't be here..." "Why can't you Beast Boy? Why can't you be in Africa? Is it that bad here?" She couldn't believe she was saying that to him- of <em>course<em> it was bad! They were in the middle of the jungle! He uncurled from his ball, tears forming in his eyes, "It's h-h-horrible here." he stammered. "Why is it horrible Beast Boy? Tell me... What is so wrong with you being here?"

He looked into her eyes as a tear fell down his face, "I'm not supposed to come home.

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><p>AN: Sorry this chapter is short guys... I feel it's kinda rushed and doesn't make much sense so I might re-write it when I have a few days offa school. First week of college is kickin' my butt.

R&R please! :D


	5. Chapter 5

**Into the Past **

**Chapter 5**

_"I'm not supposed to come home."._ The words fell on unexpecting ears. "Home? Beast Boy, what do you mean by home?" Raven was shocked, His home was with the doom patrol, they were his family, his parents... right? The green changeling just laid on the dirt ground letting tears freely flow down his face. "Beast boy?" no response, "What do you mean by home? Answer me." she pleaded, she tried reading his mind but found the boy was blocking her out. "Africa is... home" he barely whispered.

* * *

><p>Robin, Cyborg, and Starfire were finishing packing up their campsite. Beast Boy had left his backpack hanging from a tree just out of Robin's reach. The team leader wondered what else the younger titan might have that could be useful to them. "Starfire, get Beast Boy's backpack down for me and bring it here, We might find something to use in there." The masked hero directed. Starfire flew in the direction of the pack. "Robin, should we not go through friend Beast Boy's private belongings?" she questioned, "It's fine Star. We can go through it, it isn't private." he stated flatly. The girl just nodded.<p>

When she had retrieved the heavy pack she brought it over to Robin, "Please Robin, what are we looking for?", "Anything to help us get outta here" Robin replied. He began to open up the backpack when he saw a small lock over the clip "Hey Cyborg, you open this up?" "Sure Robin, I dunno why you wanna go through BB's giant waste of space bag though man." he said as he used his finger torch to cut through the lock, "it's open." . The leader of the team began to rummage through Beast Boys backpack, tossing out random things as he went. Pots, a mosquito net, a comic book, some sun screen, a blanket, a half eaten sandwich, and a compass. "_Nothing interesting or really that useful in here_" he thought to himself. He tossed the backpack away with a thud. "Huh?" he blurted out to no one, "_No empty bag thuds like that" _without a hesitation he went straight to the backpack and turned it inside out.

When he flipped it over a rectangular object hit the ground. The three titans looked at the backpack with curiosity. Robin inspected the bag and saw there was a piece of fabric that had been hiding whatever this item was.

With the strange new discovery the three had to see exactly what had fallen onto the ground. On the dirt before them was a book. A very old and worn looking book.

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><p>Raven took a deep breath. "Beast Boy, how is Africa your home? Look at me Beast Boy... Is the Doom Patrol originally from Africa?" he shook his head- adding some dirt into his already messy hair, "... no", "Okay, then how is this your home?" She knew he was beating around the bush, his whole aura was angry, depressed, and ashamed. But she mostly felt guilt from him. Slowly the green titan moved his teary eyes to look at her once more, "I was born here." he said. <em>"Finally I'm getting somewhere" <em> the empath thought, "Okay Beast Boy, that wasn't so hard was it? So you were born here, why is that a bad thing?" he said nothing, "Hmm... So were you born on a movie set or something while Rita was filming in Africa?" she questioned him, still he didn't say anything. More guilt was felt from him and something new... it was something she never thought he would feel as an emotion. It was Betrayal.

The green titan felt helpless. He was hurt and he felt like his whole world, his whole life of being "happy" was crashing down on him, with the added guilt from the beast, _"You betrayed your parents, you forgot them!" _it hissed in his mind, _"No, I loved them! I would never forget them!" _he fought back mentally with it. The beast snarled '_You forgot who you are and where you came from! You left them Garfield, you LEFT them!". _Beast Boy let out a cry, "I never left them!" not being able to control himself, Raven grabbed him during this sudden outburst, pulling him up to look at her. "Beast Boy! Get ahold of yourself, stop freaking out! Just talk to me!"

She couldn't believe the amount of worry and pity she was feeling for him, This was Beast Boy after all-the most annoying person in the world. _"You need him in your life Raven, he makes you happy_" "_Yes, he keeps us entertained too!" "and don't forget he's brave and always tries to protect you!" _Her emotions were annoying-almost as annoying as the grass stain, but they were right, _"Raven, you need to keep trying to get to him, help him. It's the least you can do for him. He's your friend." _Knowledge sounded above all the others.

He crumpled into her letting out giant sobs "I...I-I left...them..." he managed between breaths, "I know Beast Boy, you left the doom patrol and you're with us now." Raven said, letting her hand rest on his shoulder, "...no...n-not... them..." he said looking down. Raven tilted his head upward to face her, "Who is them Beast Boy?", the feeling of guilt and betrayal were strong as well as self-hatered, he sniffed, as the tears came down his green face, "my...parents.". Obviously Raven was still oblivious, "It's okay, we've all left our parents... We understand Mento was hard on you, Just because he was your leader doesn't mean he was an awesome dad... I know your mom understood that. That's why she's so proud of you, don't feel so guilty for leaving them Beast Boy." His body shuddered, "R-r-raven... Steve and... Rita... a-aren't my...I-I'm..." he cried putting his hands over his face, "They aren't my real...parents." he finally was able to blurt out. "What?" The empath asked, "But their you're family?" she questioned rather taken aback. He pulled his head away from her and wiped his eyes, he was such a wimp-crying in front of her and letting his emotions get the better of him. He was pathetic. He couldn't even keep up his own secret identity. He was betraying himself. He couldn't help it, he needed to tell someone... someone needed to know exactly what he had done.

Raven looked at her friend with a mix of confusion and pity-and she was a bit apprehensive for what he was going to say, or not say. Beast Boy was strong, he had protected her on more than one occasion, fought off Slade by himself and almost took him out, and he had been there when each and every person had lost something dear to them. It seemed to her that he was always there to lend a smile or a hand, but there had never been anything he had lost. Beast Boy wiped his nose on his sleeve, not caring that he was leaving a nasty slime trail along his arm. That was the last thing he was concerned with. He shook his head, "Rae, I'm... I'm not their son... I'm adopted... my real parents..." his eyes filled with even bigger tears that began to flow faster than a waterfall, "I-I killed them!". He fell into her body, a mix of pain, guilt, relief, and self-hatred hit her like a brick wall, She was in shock. "Beast Boy, You k-killed your parents?", He looked so small and vunerable leaning against her with his sobs growing louder and louder, "mmmhmm... they...it... Raven..." he couldn't even finish.

Whatever had happened he felt like it was his fault-heck, it might have been. She didn't know. All she knew is that she was now hugging the small sobbing green boy who she suddenly felt like a stranger with. Her shoulder was becoming really wet from his tears, "Beast Boy.." she started, "I...I...killed them... I killed them...it's all my fault..." he interrupted slightly. She just hugged him tighter, "Shhh Garfield... it's going to be okay... I'm here... Just... tell me what happened..."

* * *

><p>When the book came into Robins hands his first thought was to see exactly what it was. The three titans looked at the book and turned to the first page <em>How to teach someone Swahili <em>was the title that was listed on the front page, "You mean BB was just tryin' to learn how to speak African?" Cyborg asked, puzzled. "I guess so Cyborg" Robin muttered. "Kinda weird."

As they traveled closer to the spot where Raven and Beast Boy's communicators were signaling they were finding the brush to be more and more open with hints of light shining through the trees. "This place is beautiful, Just like the jungles of Grenthax!" Starfire exclaimed, flying around the tree tops with joy. It wasn't until they heard a noise that they knew they had found their friends. Before they could issue a greeting a single statment was heard.

__

_"I killed them."_

* * *

><p>AN: okay so sorry if you guys think Gar is a sap. He is. This story has just been floatin' around in my head forever and yeah. I need him to be an emotional wreck for once because everyone else gets their turn.

anyways R&R... sorry for the long wait. New classes, My Grandma passed away, and work were more important than writing...


	6. Authors Notes

A/N:

Guys, sorry this is taking me forever to add anything to. Right now my life is just a broken emotional roller coaster and I can't even function-let alone write.

There was some pretty mean PMs and reviews about me being worthless because I didn't upload anything new, Sorry but my personal life takes priority. If it's anything to those people who said I was worthless, you hit the nail on the head with what I'm feeling right now.

My fiance and I are over. I am the most depressed being in the entire universe right now and on top of that the only other supportive man in my life (my father) has just about ruined any chance of me fixing anything.

I will update when I get around to it. Please know I don't write these for YOU persay, I write them to help myself escape the hell that is life. If you're going to say and review rude things I won't continue.

My main priority with these stories right now is and will continue to be "It Only Takes a Moment" because that is what I've continually worked on. Its the one that I feel I am good at writing about.

I will eventually get around to finishing BOTH of these fics and just hope you guys either continue to support them or stop sending reviews like "OMG WTF, are you dead? Hurry up with this gosh." because those don't make me want to do anything right now with my emotions and I just want to curl up in a ball and died. Okay?

Thanks for understanding.

-m


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